Naruto: Kantoushi
by sedaisa-do
Summary: AU. Us being silly and interjecting ourselves into the world of naruto. Read and review :D


Hitan crept along the rocks making sure not to step on any loose stones. He saw Ada out of the corner of his eye, crawling beside him. They reached the edge shortly and peered down. Two guards stood at either side of the entrance. The glanced at each other, wordlessly communicating their plan.

* * * * *

The guard on the right shifted his weight, "yeah, I don't know why we have to stand here, it's not like any one knows about this place," he commented.

The other one nodded his head, "Yeah, it's a bit pointless."  
A woman suddenly fell to the ground in front of him, landing in a crouched position. Startled, he reached for his weapon. A searing pain ripped through his head and the world seemed to shutter. All of this happening within a split second as he succumbed to darkness.

* * * * *

Hitan's foot connected with the one guard's head. When he landed he looked up to see Ada finishing a hand seal. The guard she was dealing with held a blank stare for a moment but then proceeded to bawl and run into the forest.

* * * * *

Kotetsu leaned against a branch as he watched Hitan's foot descend onto the head of the poor guard, Izumo's shoulders shook with silent laughter as the other guard ran below them, crying. Izumo turned suddenly serious as they saw a third ninja emerge from his hiding place. He quickly did a hand seal creating a title wave of ooze, and Kotetsu leaped onto it. The third ninja looked over his shoulder to see Kotetsu surfing on the ooze and pulling out his giant scissors. Kotetsu caught up with the ninja easily, cutting off his head whilst yelling wildly. He continued to ride the wave until it died out, just short of the cave entrance. Ada and Hitan glanced up at him uncaring and he smiled happily, proud in the thought that he had just saved the two main characters lives. They entered the cave as Izumo caught up with them. There was a door to the right and a door to the left.

"I say right," Ada spoke up.

"Definitely not, left is always best," Dan argued.

"It is not, remember the last time we went left? We nearly got our heads blown off."

"That was the one time! A mere fluke that's all."

"We are going right," they glared at each other, staring one another down. Kotetsu and Izumo shifted uncomfortably neither wanting to risk getting on one of their bad sides.

After a few heated moments, for the sake of getting this mission done in a timely manner, Hitan caved. "Fine, we go right." Ada smiled triumphantly.

Hitan walked to the door, knocking if off its hinges with a powerful kick. As it fell to the ground a guard stood on the other side looking startled. "Shit" Hitan swore under his breath as he lunged forward quickly ridge-handing him to the throat. He fell back against the wall and slid down unable to attain breath. The group sprinted down the long corridor and came upon a door. Dan kicked it down to reveal four ninjas sitting at a table, eating.

"Izumo go!" Hitan said holding back. Izumo quickly did a hand seal, sending ooze flying into the room. It covered the ninjas and they found themselves unable to move. Kotetsu summoned a giant hammer and began to knock them out.

Ada glanced at Hitan, "shouldn't I just knock them out?" she asked him.

"Naw dawg naw, they need the experience," replied Hitan.

They continued on reaching a thick oak door. Ada kneeled down, pulling out a kunai and started fiddling with the lock.

"Hurry up," Hitan said impatiently.

"I'm working on it!" she replied and continued to work. After about five minutes Hitan started to tap his foot. "Do you think you can do better?" She snapped up at him.

"Yeah, get out of the way," he said pushing her aside and kicking the kunai into the lock, breaking it. The door clicked open.

"Fuck you," Ada glared and they entered the room. Inside they found the lab with the children being experimented on. Dan leapt over two of the children, forming a hand seal. His finger tips bursted into flames and they spread down to his elbow. He punched one of the evil ninjas, the flames exploding on his face. Izumo formed a hand seal and spit acid ooze on to another's face. Kotetsu threw his scissors at one, trapping him by his neck to the wall while Ada locked eyes with the fourth, who stared helplessly into the black that was her eyes. He fell into the abyss, feeling nothing. It felt like years to him, years of feeling nothingness. He longed to feel something, anything. He knew of no way to escape this but to kill himself. So he took out his kunai and plunged it into his throat.

"Ok," Ada said, "we need to get him to talk."

"I suppose torture would be a viable option," Said Hitan.

"Let's cut off his fingers! Does anyone have scissors?" Ada asked looking immediately to Kotetsu. His eyes darted around as he pulled out a pair of scissors. Ada went up to the man pinned against the wall. "Tell us where the children are!" She growled at him.

"Never!" he answered. Ada then nodded at Kotetsu who opened his scissors around the ninja's pointer finger. He was about to scream, as he always did when he used scissors, when the ninja spoke up.

"Wait!" he said, his eyes desperate, "they are down the hall and to the right!"

They waited half a second and the suddenly Hitan hit the one side of the scissors trapping the ninja's neck, severing his head. Blood spattered onto them.

"Damnit Hitan! You got blood all over me," Ada said trying to wipe it from her face but only smearing it. They ran down the hallway and slid open the door to the children only to find a man twice their size staring down at them. Hitan and Ada sighed and rolled their eyes while Kotetsu and Izumo took battle stances. Izumo spat ooze at the man's feet, hoping to immobilize him. But alas it did not work and he stepped out of it swinging a large wooden club at Izumo. Kotetsu, acting fast, summoned a large metal club and swung it, shattering the wooden one. The large man reached with his other hand grabbing a hold of the metal one and ripping it from kotetsu's grasp. He then swung it at Kotetsu and he rolled out of the way. Izumo and Kotetsu battled fiercely with him. After a while of this Kotetsu was knocked to a wall and he crumpled to the ground, panting. Izumo leaned against the wall next to him. Hitan and Ada figured now would be a good time to jump in. Hitan ran towards the large man. Running on the wall he formed a hand seal and from his knee down erupted into flame. He round house kicked the large man in the face, the flames bursting onto him. In one fluid motion Ada threw a kunai at him and formed a hand seal, splitting the single kunai into thirty each thudding into the man's chest. While he was distracted Kotetsu recovered and screamed wildly as he cut the man's Achilles tendon. The man shouted in pain and fell onto his back. Izumo summoned a giant jelly fish and it flopped onto the man, its electricity going through the kunai and shocking the man, killing him. The four leaf ninja now turned their attention to the children in cages.

"Shit, did anyone grab the keys?" Hitan asked. Everyone shook their heads.

"I'll get them!" Izumo volunteered happily and jogged out the room.

"I don't feel like waiting," Ada said and Hitan nodded in agreement. He walked to the first cage and put his hands to the lock, heating it up. When it was sufficiently hot enough he moved on to the next one. Ada went to the first one freezing it. Once it was frozen Kotetsu yelled and cut it with his scissors. They continued this process with the rest of the cages and when they were done Izumo ran back in, holding the keys. He saw that the kids were already freed "Oh...well never mind" he said and threw the keys down.

They traveled to the land of Rice Patties to return the orphan children and met with the leader.

"Thank you so much!" He said to them, smiling warmly.

"It was no problem," Ada replied.

"Now if we can get our payment, we'll get home," interjected Hitan.

"Yes, yes of course!" he said paying them, "but please stay, clean yourselves up. It would be our honor for you to cut the ribbon to our new orphanage."

"I would gladly cut it!" Kotetsu answered. After they all cleaned up, they gathered at the orphanage. The leader gave a short speech and Kotetsu startled the crowd with his mad screams as he sliced the ribbon.

"Ok," Ada said after they had a nice meal "let's go home."

* * * * *

Back in the leaf village Ada, Hitan, Kotetsu, and Izumo walked to Tsunade's office.

"Oh gawd," Hitan spoke suddenly.

"What?" asked Ada.

"Shizune is probably going to be there" Ada just laughed at him.

They entered Tsunade's office and proceeded to debrief her, Hitan glaring at Shizune the whole time. "Very good you guys. You have a week of down time."

After the meeting Kotetsu and Izumo went to go do their thing and Ada went directly to bed. Hitan, however, went to get ramen with Naruto, Hinata, and Sasuke.

The next day Hitan and Ada met up with Neji and Tenten on the training grounds.

"Hey guys!" Ada said running up and pulling them both into a tight hug. They laughed and exchanged hellos.

"Hey Neji, would you like to train with me?" Hitan asked.

"It would be my honor," the other boy replied. The two pairs went to opposite sides of the training grounds. "Alright," Neji said to Hitan "let's see what you got." Hitan concentrated his chakra. When he thought he was ready he grunted...and promptly fell on his face. Neji sighed and face-palmed.

Ada linked her arm through Tenten's as they walked to the other side of the field, "So, how do you want to train?"

"Well, Neji and I would normally battle, obviously, and I would just chuck things at him."

"Speaking of Neji, are you guys a couple yet?"

Tenten blushed "yeah"

"Omg!! Tell me everything!"

* * * * *

"Ok," Neji said, "watch closely" he demonstrated his rotation perfectly. Hitan crossed his arms and put his hand to his chin. He nodded his head and said "hmm"

* * * * *

"And then he took me for ramen and on the way home he kissed me!" The two girls squealed in unison.

"That's so awesome!" Ada gushed. They had sat down cross legged, facing each other.

* * * * *

Hitan did a number of hand seals ending with the dragon. Fire encased him, spinning around. When it stopped Neji put his hands on his hips, "close enough" he said smiling slightly. A tree burned beside him.

* * * * *

The girls paused in their talking when the fire erupted. When they realized everything was fine they continued talking.

"So what about you?" Tenten asked "anything going on with you and Kiba?"

Ada laughed, "Well, we made out last time we were both in town, but decided we were better friends."

* * * * *

The sun was starting to go down and Hitan and Neji looked over to find the girls were lying on their backs, talking. They hadn't gotten any training done. They sighed.

"Well want to go do something?" Hitan asked.

"There's a party at Naruto's tonight"

"Sweet, I'm in."

* * * * *

"So what are we doing tonight?" Ada asked.

"There's a party at Naruto's, you comin?"

"fo sho"

* * * * *

When Ada arrived the party was in full swing. Yamato had changed the landscape and added a waterfall and lake. She was suddenly tackled by a very large adorable dog.

"Akamaru!" She giggled as he licked her face.

"Akamaru get off her!" She heard Kiba's voice. He helped her off the ground and she threw herself into his arms.

"Kiba!" She said in greeting.

Hitan sat on the edge of the dock with Neji and Sasuke. "How was your guys' life been?" he asked them.

"Pretty good," Neji answered, "just been doing missions, oh and I'm dating Tenten now."

Their attention was drawn to the top of the waterfall for a moment. Naruto, Tenten, Ada, and Kiba were standing on the top, hands interlocked, counting down. When they got to one, they jumped shouting as they fell.

"That's cool," Hitan went on the conversation, "what about you Sasuke?"

"I haven't killed my brother yet," he replied grumpily.

"Oh, well I think he's here" Sasuke was up in a flash and disappeared onto the crowd. Ada was suddenly behind Hitan, and shoved him into the water.

"Have fun you emo bastard!!" She laughed as he bobbed in the water, glaring at her. While Neji was busy laughing at Hitan, Tenten snuck up behind him and pushed him in, but as he was falling he grabbed a hold of her arm, bringing her in with him. When they both surfaced they laughed and kissed sweetly.

Ada moved on to setting up twister while Hitan got out of the lake, steaming. He rounded up Sasuke and Itachi and they did their fire ball justu to start the bon fire. A few games of twister later and Ada found herself tangled up with Kakashi.

"Right l-leg green," Hinata called out from where she was lounging against Naruto.

"Sorry for this," Kakashi apologized as he further entangled his legs with hers.

"Don't be, I like it," She purred in his ear. He chuckled nervously.

"L-left hand blue."

"Hey Ada, Kakashi," Neji said as this latest call had moved him closer to them. After a while the three of them were so twisted together that you couldn't tell whose leg was whose. Ada's muscles ached from holding her and Kakashi up for so long.

"Oh I give!" she said finally, collapsing to the ground taking Kakashi with her.

"Neji wins!" everyone cheered. Kakashi layed on top of Ada and she grinned devilishly at him.

"Fancy meeting you here," she said and he got up quickly.

"Sorry," he mumbled before going to join the other adults.

They all hung around the fire for the rest of the night, laughing and having a good time. Enjoying the rare time everyone was home from missions. The only mild disturbance was Choji swearing that Zetsu was stalking him. But who believed that? Silly Choji.

AN: comments are welcome! We did this for fun one day and decided to post it on here. There will most likely be more coming soon..or whenever we get bored again. Lol-Ada


End file.
